Rant - I’m not Captain Save A Gimp

At the risk of sounding like the most horrible disabled person who ever rolled across the face of the Earth, there is something I need to get off my chest.

About once a week, I get a phone call or an email, or someone in person spills the following on me.

“I know this lady who is disabled and doesn’t really have any friends so, she’s depressed a lot. You should hook up with her and hang out. I bet you two would have a ton in common!”

Riiiiiiiight. She has no friends and is depressed so she must be a barrel of laughs. Sign me the fuck up!

This nonsense needs to stop right now. Stop torturing me with your socially inept disabled friends who are depressed because they have negative attitudes!

To further illustrate my point here are a few equally inappropriate scenarios. Imagine what may transpire if you or I approached someone and said:

• Hey there, morbidly obese lady! I know another morbidly obese lady. You two should totally hang out. You would have a TON in common. Get it? A TON!
• Hi. I see that you are an ignorant redneck with poor grooming habits. I met a guy just like you at a bar last weekend. He gave me his number. Want it? You’d get along great.
• Hey, I couldn’t help from noticing that you are black. I have a neighbor who is also black. Want me to get his number for you? Maybe you guys can go shoot some hoops together.

I realize and honestly do appreciate that those of you who have done this, have good intensions.  I don't hate you.  You are just trying to help an unhappy friend.

If your disabled friend contacted me directly, that would be different. I’d be more receptive to establishing a friendship that isn’t forced by a third party. I’m not Captain Save A Gimp though.

If you think that I can be of inspiration to someone, then buy him/her a copy of the movie.